We’ve all heard about ‘new math’, or ‘common core’, or any of the other recent terms for the new ways that children are taught the same old lessons in schools these days. All I know is that I’m thankful my child is an adult and finished with those lessons because honestly, I don’t know if I’d be able to help her these days. I dread the day my grandson asks me a question related to his lessons. Of course, that’s the day I’ll get to say, “Go ask your mom”.

This week I was having one of my video chats with Babcia. We were talking about her weekend and mine. At one point during our conversation my sister-in-law came by to check on my mama. Emily is the gatekeeper and the iron fist when it comes to Babcia’s health. She has taken on the role of being Babcia’s advocate where health care is concerned. She is next door so there’s the proximity, and she also has a background in healthcare administration so she is very knowledgeable in this area. She’s a double threat to Babcia. Emily keeps an eye on everything from medication to diet to excercise and mood. It is, of course, a good thing as mom has several health issues that come along with aging and must be monitored.

Following the Rules… Mostly

For the most part, my mom follows her doctors’ orders. She prepares her pills for the week and has them ready to go. A detailed record of daily activity is kept by Babcia herself, including all her metrics. She is aware of what types of foods she should or shouldn’t have in most cases. As well as she does many days, there are days when things don’t go so well too. As much of a stickler as Babcia is for rules, she is also Polish. That brings a love for certain foods that cannot be easily overcome.

Every day, she fights the battle of the bread. Carbs are a no-no for diabetics, but bread is a MUST for the Polish. Bread with every meal, a slice or two with butter to hold you over between meals, bread for breakfast, lunch, and dinner… and a midnight snack. The bread that the Polish love to eat is the really good bread too, which makes it even harder to pass up. Polish bread has a chewy (or sometimes crusty) outside and a soft, delicious inside that’s wonderful with melted unsalted butter on top. Chleb i maslo… bread and butter… is a demon that Babcia fights daily.

Slices on Slices

The other day when we were video chatting, I listened in as Emily asked Babcia a few questions. Apparently her sugar had been high so Emily asked Babcia how many slices of bread she’d eaten that day. No sense asking IF she’d eaten bread, that was a given. It’s more appropriate to just go ahead and ask how many.

Emily: So how many pieces of bread did you have today?

Babcia: Two. (Then, after a pause, almost inaudibly…) Four times.

Emily: Two?? FOUR times?? That’s eight piec….. (gets cut off)

Babcia: No I meant just two. Just two, that’s it.

There was a short period of silence after this because no one may ever know the exact number of slices of bread that were eaten in that house. I was, however, confused and amused by Babcia’s quick reply at first of “Two. (four times)” What kind of new magical math was this?? It was as if she believed that incremental servings of bread were somehow less harmful than just eating a half loaf of bread all at one sitting.

That’s not really her fault either. I remember growing up and kind of being pushed in that direction with food any time I was in the presence of one of my Polish aunts. I never saw any of them sit down and gorge themselves on food at one sitting. Incremental snacking throughout the day however was not only allowed but encouraged. There was always food on a table and there were always people sitting around that table talking and munching. Food has always connected us.

Trying to Be Healthy

Alas, as we grow older we must all make choices about what goes into our bodies. Things we used to eat daily without a second thought eventually become rare treats if we’re lucky. Sometimes we even have to give up certain foods for good. I struggle with this concept myself every day. I’m well aware that my bikini days are long gone, but I’m also painfully aware that anything I eat will have a specific effect on how I feel and I want to try to feel good more than I feel bad. I’m learning that food can either heal you or hurt you. It’s not easy to make those choices all the time, and it’s not always cut and dry. All we can do is to keep trying with each new day to do what we tell the little ones to do, “Make good choices today”. At times those choices just suck. Feeling terrible and not being able to use your body the way you want to sucks more.

Babcia and I keep on trying. One thing is certain, she’s no quitter.