When someone passes on, they leave behind rooms full of things. At first, these rooms are a sad reminder of those we’ve lost. The weight of the memories is almost too much to bear and every photo or item haunts you. Eventually our hearts begin to heal and our curiousity overtakes us, and we are able to begin sifting through the pictures and the trinkets to piece together the story of a life. In doing this we are able to honor them, and to keep them with us.

Cheers

Babcia had a wooden recipe box that sat on her kitchen counter for years. Over time she filled it with recipes she’d cut from magazines, recipes she’d gotten from friends or family, and hand written recipes from her memory for dishes she or her family had prepared long ago. I remember making a few things from the recipe box when I was younger, and she also shared them with her granddaughters as they were growing up. One afternoon I began looking through the recipe box, which was alphabetized. Under ‘T’, she’d saved a few index cards with toasts written on them. It had been years since Babcia had taken a drink of alcohol of any kind. Seeing these toasts in her handwriting brought me a smile, knowing that she’d saved them just in case. I’m sure they brought back sweet memories for her when she looked at them.

The Toasts in the Recipe Box

“Here’s to one and only one, and may that one be he/she. Who loves one and only one, and may that one be me.” – My mama told me that once she was talking to her mother, my Babcia, after she’d had her heart broken and asked if she’d ever find her one true love. My babcia told my mama… “he will come one day from far away when you least expect it, and you won’t know what hit you”. How true that turned out to be.

“Drink today and drown all sorrow, you shall perhaps not do it tomorrow. Best while you have it use your breath, there’ll be no drinking after death.” – A reminder to live life to the fullest while we are here, something she did whenever possible.

“The Frenchman loves his native wine, the German loves his beer. The Englishman loves his ‘alf and ‘alf, because it brings good cheer. The Irishman Loves his whiskey straight, because it gives him dizziness. The American has no choice at all, so he drinks the whole damn business.” – This may be my favorite!

“Cold water is the best of drinks and fit for prince or king. But who am I that I should take the best of everything? Let princes revel at the pump, kings with the tap make free. Champagne or gin or even beer are good enough for me.” – A humorous nod to revelry; I can picture her saying this with a grin.

“Be glad and your friends are many, be sad and you lose them all. There are none who decline your nectared wine, but alone you must drink life’s gall.” – I’ve actually heard my mama say this one many times. It’s a reminder that we all have hard times and we must sometimes go through them quietly and alone, something she had to do at many times during her life. However, seeing her strength and fortitude also reminds me that we can make it through and that happier times will come again.

Other Toasts

There are a few others we heard growing up with a Polish mama. Of course there’s na zdrowie (cheers) which translates ‘to health’. The one I remember hearing most of all though was probably sto lat… either as an exclamation or in song. Sto lat is a birthday or celebratory song, meant to wish someone a long life… it translates to ‘100 years’. Mama signed birthday cards with sto lat, and several times I heard her sing it either alone or with her family. It is truly the staple of Polish birthday songs.

Two Legs

One last toast I must mention relates to a story that is actually my brother’s, although I was there to witness it. During a visit to Chicago when my brother may have been around 13 years old or so, our Dziadek called him into the kitchen one morning. Dziadek (our grandfather) told him to come sit and they would have a drink. He proceeded to pour two shots, one for him and one for my brother. In Dziadek’s eyes, it was a rite of passage into manhood for my brother. For my brother, it was a chance to have a forbidden shot of liquor. No matter, it is a memory we both have to this day. After the shots were drunk, Dziadek poured a second for them both. My brother’s eyes grew large as he wasn’t quite prepared to take shots with Dziadek right after breakfast, but he powered through. As they raised their shot glasses to toast, Dziadek told him…”A man cannot walk on just one leg”… and after a clink, they drank their shots down.

While doing some reading I actually came across a toast that refers to my Dziadek’s line to my brother that day. The toast is “Na druge noge” which means, “for the second leg”. The toast basically means that if you are feeling unstable after a few drinks/shots, you should have another to regain your balance. Dziadek was actually shoring my brother up for the next round.

Toast to a Life Well Lived

It was a nice surprise to find these toasts in Mama’s old recipe box. Hopefully I can remember one or two and use them at some point down the road, in her honor. It will be like she is right there celebrating with us. I know she would love that!