Yesterday I spent the morning thrifting, which I enjoy doing now and then. It’s always fun to find bargains, it’s like a little treasure hunt. If you’re really lucky, you can find the perfect item for your home or designer clothing for next to nothing. I’m happy when I come home with big bags full of stuff and very little money has disappeared from my bank account. There are many consignment shops where I live and I like to hit them all once in a while, although I think my favorite is Fifi’s. If you live in the Jacksonville area and enjoy consignment shops check out Fifi’s. Here’s a tip… all of them have a bargain room in the back that is the last stop for consignment items and they’re marked down aggressively, always start there. There’s also Clothes Mentor, Round Robin in Middleburg, Plato’s, Once Upon a Child, Ms. Mulligan’s, Uptown Cheapskate, Plato’s Closet, local Goodwill stores, and Hospice Thrift. A few are chains, a few are family owned, and these are just a few of the many consignment and thrift stores nearby but they all offer bargains and unusual items. I enjoy looking through the stores at my own pace and seeing what I might find. I started out at Goodwill on the southside (or as my friend Steph call it “The Goot-will”) and went from there to consignment stores, ending up at T.J. Maxx which is always fun. It’s like going to indoor yard sales but on a bigger scale, the excitement is in the hunt and the discovery.

While walking the aisles at Goodwill, I noticed a female employee speaking with an older male customer. Actually, it was more like he was talking to her as he was doing most of the talking and she was listening and agreeing politely. It was one of those conversations you hear and then feel the need to save the person doing the listening because it’s just painful to witness. The lady appeared to be a middle aged Asian woman, small in stature and very polite and agreeable. The man was probably in his 60s-70s and towered over her. Let me start by saying that he was not violent in any way, but he was obviously controlling the conversation and he towered over her which made the dynamic very one sided. They were standing in front of a display of electronics and he was explaining to her that he liked a particular television in the display. Apparently the television had a remote with it but no power cord. He was asking the lady how she expected anyone to buy the television when it had no power cord and could not be tested. Not that any of the televisions were on anyway, I mean… it’s Goodwill. She nicely explained that they put items out for sale as they are received, and that sometimes electronics come with a cord and/or remote and sometimes they don’t. They are priced accordingly, but the employees have no control over this. The man went on to say how they should be more like Walmart and have the TVs on so that people know they work before they buy them. The lady patiently explained that this wasn’t always possible. My first thought was “it’s GOODWILL for Pete’s sake, if you want it to be like Walmart then go to Walmart”.

The man said to her, “Why would anyone ever buy this TV without turning it on?” She said, “Actually a lot of customers do buy things without testing them first.” To which he said, “Well that doesn’t make any sense.” Her: “Well I don’t know what to tell you sir, but people buy these things all the time.” Him: “You really should put them out here with the power cord and remote attached to them so people can see them.” Her: “We accept donations as they come to us, so we don’t always get the power cord or remote. It just isn’t always possible.” Him: “Yeah, but do you understand what I’m saying? Why would I buy this? You should have these on like they do at Walmart.” Her, smiling: “I understand what you are saying. I’ll bring that up so maybe we can do that in the future.” Him: “I mean, why would I pay $40 for this TV when I don’t know if it works? That’s crazy.” Her: “Yes, I see what you are saying. Some people do buy them though.” Him: “But why would anyone do that? Do you see what I’m saying? What you need to do is have them on like they do at other stores.” At this point, I wanted to walk over there and firmly explain to him that this was Goodwill and not Walmart, and that he should go to Walmart if he wanted to see a wall of TVs turned on. First of all, having the TVs on was probably not her decision to make and second of all, it’s GOODWILL, who doesn’t understand how Goodwill works? In the midst of all this, I noticed a sign up that said that electronics under a certain price come with a guarantee and can be returned within 5 days for a full refund. He was being condescending to her and he wasn’t going to let it go which was bad enough. Then out of the blue, he drops this bomb.

Him: “Say, by the way, you’re obviously not from around here. Where are you from?” Her: “Excuse me? What do you mean? I live in Jacksonville.” Him: “Yes, but you’re not from here, right? You have an accent.” Her, again smiling: “I don’t think I have an accent, to me it sounds like you have an accent.” SCORE one for the Goodwill lady. Him: “I don’t have an accent. But you do have an accent. What is that, are you Jamaican?” At this point I looked up from the racks at them and I thought my eyes were going roll into the back of my skull. He was leaning over her and smiling as he spoke to her, but there was an obvious sarcasm and controlling demeanor about him as he attempted to steer the conversation and belittle her. If I had been in her shoes at that point, I’d probably have said something that would’ve gotten me fired. But this sweet lady never lost her composure, she remained calm and smiling at him while she stood her ground. There was a peace about her. Her, to him: “No, I am not Jamaican.” Him: “Oh. I just wondered because your accent sounds kind of Jamaican.” He laughs a little laugh. She laughs back, never taking her eyes off him. Him: “Oh okay, I just thought you sounded like you were from the islands or something. Well anyway, I hope you understand what I’m saying about these TVs. You should really do something about that. You could probably sell more TVs that way.” Her: “Let me go see if we have a cord lying around that will fit that TV. If so, I’ll bring it out for you. But I can’t guarantee that we will have one as we only have what is donated to us as it comes in.” At this point she walks away. I continued browsing the aisles, thinking about the nerve of this guy. Either he was completely clueless or else he was trying to get her goat. The lady was very obviously Asian. Was he that small minded and uneducated? Was he a control freak? Was he just rude and overbearing? I’ll never know the answer to those questions as that’s pretty much where I left the situation and conversation. It did make me think though. I thought about my own mother and what kind of people she must’ve had to deal with throughout her life. My mother has a heavy Polish accent to this day; she came to the United States at 15 and just turned 79 so we’re talking about a lot of years of dealing with people. One of my favorite stories/memories is of seeing someone say to my mom, “That’s an interesting accent, what are you?” She replied without missing a beat, “I’m an American, what are you?” Unfortunately, this wasn’t a single episode scenario and I’ve heard her say that to someone on several occasions. Personally, I don’t think it is rude to ask where someone is from or where their family is from. I find it interesting to talk to people from other places around the world. Sometimes I’ll hear someone speak and there is familiarity in their speech and I’m tempted to ask if they are Polish, or at least Slavic. It’s as if I feel a camaraderie or a connection to them and I am curious. I don’t see a problem with asking politely, and most people are proud to tell you about their heritage. We can gain so much from speaking with someone from a different place, new perspectives, interesting stories, and appreciation for who they are. Our differences are what make us all so unique and interesting. I love that we aren’t all exactly the same.

As I finished up my thrifting at Goodwill and went to the counter with my finds, I had to walk past the TVs once more. The man was still there, attempting to match a remote he’d found to one of the televisions. A passerby was trying to help him and he was talking about buying one particular TV. I have a feeling he ended up buying one of those TVs anyway, even after all the fuss. It was never really worth all the arguing in the first place. I reminded myself that maybe that was his entire social interaction for the day. Maybe he went home and told everyone about explaining things to the Jamaican lady at the Goodwill. Maybe he felt that he’d accomplished the first step in reforming Goodwill to make it competitive with the big chain stores. I laughed to myself as I walked out with my little bag of treasures, not knowing for sure if they were worth the money I’d paid for them. I was okay with that. It’s all part of the fun. I stepped outside and put on my sunglasses and enjoyed my half Polish, half hillbilly world.