I realized yesterday that my daughter is turning 29 this year. I am shocked. How dare she. I mean here I am thinking it’s only been a few years since I was 35 and she has the gall to turn 29. And about to become a mama on top of that. Inconceivable.

Yes I know, children grow up. But do they have to do it so quickly? Everyone tells you they’ll be grown in the blink of an eye, and it really is true. I only blinked twice… maybe three times… and here we are. It’s not all bad. I’m truly proud of the woman she is and how she handles everything life has thrown at her. She has a kind heart and big smile for everyone she meets. We found out a few days ago that her little one may be early, which is fantastic, as long he stays put long enough to be fully cooked in there. She laughed and said, “He’s going to be just like his dad, early to everything.” Hilarious, since (not unlike the rest of us) she’s always late. She’s going to have to learn to deal with both of them in that respect. They are hustling to put his nursery together, to finish building his furniture (yes I said BUILDING), and to prepare for little man to come home. His daddy has hand made the crib and changing table, which I absolutely love. He’s done a wonderful job of it too. Her baby shower is coming up, they’re sorting through hand-me-downs, and getting generally excited about the reality of having a baby in the house. I can’t help but feel a little nostalgic, and also look forward a little bit to all the beautiful things she has to look forward to. Like realizing your baby is turning 29 and you’re old.

And then there’s Sophie. She sounds smarter every time I talk with her. We chat when she’s at Babcia’s house and I call. She is very observant and seems to know so much about the world as she sees it. She’s more than happy to give you her opinion and explain why she’s right. Self-assured, intelligent, brave, and opinionated, she’s a little spitfire for sure. Look out world, my niece is coming for you. She’s on the edge of puberty and traveling full speed ahead. Of course she’s still a kid. I was reminded of that when she told me that if I didn’t make it home for the holidays she was going to mail me a package of dog poo to express her unhappiness. Disgusting, yet very creative. I am one proud auntie.

Of course with all this going on I think back on my own life. My childhood, my later years, young adulthood. I think about all the things I’ve experienced and all I have yet to discover. My faint memories of my first years in Chicago are good ones. I was lucky to spend time with Babcia’s side of the family and all my cousins, aunts, and uncles, and to be immersed in some of the Polish culture at a young age. Then there were the years growing up in West Virginia, which will always be home to me. Running around in the country at Mammaw and Pappaw’s house, playing in the creeks, spending time with my hillbilly clan… all terrific memories also. This mixture of city and country made me the person I am, and the person I am so proud to be. Then one day I had a little girl and I grew up. I learned so much from her, probably more than she ever learned from me. She will soon understand that feeling as well. Life really is a circle.

Which brings us back to my daughter turning 29 in December like it’s no big deal and not even considering my feelings about the whole thing. Doesn’t she know that when I look at her I will always see that little girl who made me laugh and cuddled up with me on the couch to watch a movie or read a book? That I will always look at the pictures she drew for me and feel my heart melt? I mean, how did we get here? And when did she learn to be such an adult? I guess I have no choice but to embrace these changes and go forward. And I will, proudly. But that doesn’t mean that I won’t always be ready to fix her mac and cheese and put The Swan Princess on for us to watch together. (Always Lindy).