I was talking to Babcia, my mama, on the phone the other day. We got around to talking about our aches and ailments, as people do, when she said, “It’s funny how aging won’t let you live your life”. Obviously, you can age and still live to tell about it, but I got what she was saying. Your body sometimes can’t keep up with your head and your heart and your desires. Everyone knows that a Babcia lives to serve. They want to wait on YOU, they want to serve YOU, but most of all they want to feed you and show you love by stuffing you full of sausage and bread. It it not a complete life otherwise.

With Babcia, it isn’t so much the cooking but the doing. You need a blanket? Let me get it. You need a drink? With or without ice? You need $10 for the show you’re going to? I’ll get my purse. You’re hungry? Sit down, I’ll heat something up. It’s what they live for. They want to see everyone happy, full, and satisfied. You like that pillow? Take it home with you. You want a bowl like that? Take it with you, I have another one. If you just look at something a moment too long it will mysteriously end up in your car and going home with you. If you don’t want to take things home, do NOT compliment. EVER.

When Babcia said “aging won’t let you live your life”, I knew what she meant. It makes it harder to do for others. She may not get around as well as she used to so she can’t fetch your every desire from another room so quickly any more. Her hands hurt, so she may not be able to cook a big meal or do arts and crafts with her grandchildren. Her heart flutters so she might have to sit on the couch when she’d rather be sitting on the porch watching them play outside. We all age. We all deteriorate as we go through life. We all have that “I’m not what I used to be” feeling now and then.

And so, I took an opportunity to remind Babcia of all she is to us, all she still does, and all she’s done in the past. She sits with her youngest granddaughter every day and plays games, watches movies, talks and laughs, and creates arts and crafts as she is able. She still loves her older granddaughter and brags about her to everyone she sees. She still send a good morning text and a good night text to her children daily, and always waits for our replies. She “checks in” with us and it reminds us to do the same not only with her, but with each other. She loves us. She binds us.

She is aging. I don’t want to think about how that ends. I still need her here with me every day. She is my confidante. She is my history. She is the most beautiful lady I know. She is my comforter, my harshest critic, my roots, my map. Yes, she is aging. But she is still right here and you’d best believe she won’t let any of us forget it.

Thursday is her birthday. She will be 78 years young. If you feel like doing so, drop a “happy birthday babcia” on my Facebook page. I’ll show her every single wish.